I'm having trouble coming up with a title for this blog. I have a lot on my mind and really just don't know what to call it. It's funny how having a kid becomes such a part of who and what you are. Amanda and I are both very aware of that as we sit in bed on this night. We found out earlier today that a very good childhood friend of mine lost their 5 month old baby today.
I don't want to say that Cooper is sometimes taken for granted. He very much is not. I will admit that you become very accustom to having him around though. We had a conversation the other night about remembering "life before Cooper" and how anti-climatic it was. To think of being forced to endure what our friends are right now is really very scary. I remember being in the emergency room with Coop and feeling completely helpless as I held this little boy who was just so small. I remember having to be the rock for Amanda and how difficult that was since all I really wanted to do was break down myself. The thought of those feelings being prolonged is just so difficult to comprehend.
I'm definitely not the most religious person in the world, but I do believe that God has a plan, and even though we may not agree with it or understand it, it does all work out in the end. I firmly believe that going through what we went through with Cooper brought the three of us so much closer and made Amanda and I both so much more aware of how special this gift was.
Our hearts are breaking tonight for our friends. I honestly can not imagine being in their shoes and dealing with the feelings that they are feeling. I am reminded of the poem "Footprints" that my great-grandmother used to have in her house that she gave to Hillary. I pray that God carries them at this very difficult time in their lives.
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